04.11.98 - Season of goodwill goes out the window

The last two days at work have just been "go! go! go!". There have been umpteen requests for ad-hoc statistical information, I have been trying to sort out some programming problems with the software we have bought, I've been trying to do the regular work in the office and also I have been trying to keep myself organised so that the pile of paperwork on my desk does not grow legs, walk up and hit me. Pauline was back today... thank goodness! Funny though that as soon as she got back I found myself struggling to look for things for her to do. I still seemed to have loads for myself though. I guess I am just not good at delegating very well and I think part of that is that I only ever trust myself to do the best job in my mind. I am so discriminating with things like that (or maybe the word is fussy) but I am also impatient to try and hand over my knowledge all the time when I am trying to get on with my regular work.

Work always goes quickly when you're busy though so I didn't mind and indeed it did go quite quickly. The only thing I really got annoyed with was the office politics concerning the Christmas dinner... oh and the deputy director of finance coming in and talking crap for half an hour which totally confused me. The Christmas dinner started off badly when one group said they didn't like the venue and decided to arrange something for themselves at another venue. Now I didn't like the original venue either so I agreed to go with this other group. Now that group has split into two as well because one lot of people say they do not want to socialise with some of the people outside of a work setting. One of those people is the delightful manager I am sure I have mentioned many a time in my journal before (the one who said I had an attitude and is always rude to people herself... oh and took far too long to sort out my regrading). At this point I just got completely sick of the whole thing. I mean I was willing to sit with people I don't really like and socialise at this Christmas dinner because (a) it is free, courtesy of hospital charity funds and (b) it's Christmas, season of goodwill blah blah blah.... Anyway I have decided I just don't want to go at all and even though I am a bit sad about that I just keep reminding myself that it is better than feeling like I don't want to go out on the night and waste my time with a load of whiners (err.... like me! hehehe).

Things are still more exciting in my social life and I find that I can't wait to get home in the evenings to sort out when my next outing is or to sit and plan things or make phone calls and I suppose it's good in a way because it means that my fear of being lonely when I leave home is pretty unfounded. I think I will manage to keep myself busy quite nicely! I phoned someone and arranged to go out this weekend although I am not sure whether it will turn out to be Friday or Saturday. I am secretly hoping it will turn out to be Friday because that way I still have Saturday free to do something else and also it means I can stay out late and not worry about transport because I will be able to get a lift home with my Dad beyond the time the last train leaves... that's if I come back home at all that night ;-) I need to go into Oxford Street or Regent Street in London to do a bit of shopping. I need some new trousers and possibly a top that's a bit more fashionable than the ones I already have and I also need to go shopping for some presents and bits and pieces for my friends in America when I meet them in a few (or a couple!) of weeks. I don't know where I will find the time or the money to do all this really but where there is a will there is a way! I have another weekend after this one before my holiday. My practical side tells me that I should leave it free to prepare for my holiday but my heart tells me that I should have one last party weekend to celebrate having finished work for two and a half weeks and for finally getting off my arse and making to America. Are we taking bets on whether I stay in or go out that weekend? Hehehe.

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